We'll see

I am holding my breath here in Uganda watching certain international events unfold. (By watching I mean listening to on the radio and reading about in the newspaper.) I can't bring myself to feel happy about this considering the repercussions it has the potential of sparking. I do feel somewhat relieved, and proud that as a country we never gave up, but looking at the last ten years and seeing what hatred and division has taken over my country, I can't help but wonder what the next ten years have in store.

On to happier things, like my turquoise walls. I went on Sunday to pick out paint, feeling pretty sure I was going to have to chose from one of nine generic colors, but was totally blown away by an actual wall of paint samples like in the good ole' US of A. My eyes zoomed in on the brightest, most obnoxious deep turquoise there was, and I bought two cans of it for 90,000/=. I spent all afternoon slopping up three, nay, four coats of the stuff, and there are still streaks in some places. I broke my own rule by putting such a cool color in a place where I look in the mirror, because now my face always has a greenish-bluish tinge to it and I have to remind myself that I'm not sick or choking when I'm getting dressed in the morning. Tomorrow, fingers crossed, I will be venturing back into the town to pick up a cabinet that I put a deposit on, along with a sofa and a table. I have things to hang up but don't want to do that until I have furniture in place to gauge where everything should go (I'm hanging things with giant nails that don't like being repositioned, and duct tape that has all the intention of peeling my pretty paint.)

I had a staff meeting today, my first real Ugandan meeting on my own with no other Americans to sit near and commiserate with. It was supposed to start at 9, so I got there at a few minutes till, asked where it was, and was told by the secretary that no one was there yet, so to wait in the staff room. I sat there until about 9:30, thankful I'd brought my book, when I decided to wander to the library to see if maybe they'd just forgotten to tell me it was starting, but no, they hadn't. I was the first one there, and slowly some of my colleagues meandered in. At about 10:30 the principal started saying things like "Eh! Have they forgotten?" and "This rain, it has delayed them, surely," and making phone calls. We started around 11 am, opened with a prayer, covered two items in the agenda, and then took a tea break. I got lost in all that was discussed, but a lot of it seemed like things that could be decided in private meetings or among the administration rather than in a general beginning of term meeting. Five prayers, one lunch, and six hours later, we were done. Just like the laundry, I have very little sympathy for any of my friends who have to attend staff meetings, sorry. The list is growing.

It's May??

Last week kind of sucked. Lots of little things contributed, but a few of the main ones were waiting around for various carpenters and repairmen to work on things like my door frame, a leak in my roof, and some bees that were too close for comfort. All the waiting for people to come by meant limited time walking around my village greeting and getting to know people. School is on break right now until the 23rd, so a lot of people who are here normally are gone, which adds to the uncertainty of who is who and what do they do. I generally felt like I sucked as a volunteer because I wasn't out being proactive and making dinner for my neighbors and inviting them over and all that jazz.

On Wednesday I broke down and wandered to the market, hoping not to miss anyone coming by to work on my house, because God knows when they'd come by again. The market in Boroboro leaves much to be desired and it looks like I'll be traveling into Lira for most of my food that isn't tomatoes or onions. Wednesday and Thursday all I ate were eggs, tomatoes, and onions. And then I got sick. The fun kind of sick that leaves me trotting to the latrine every so often. The kind of sick that makes me miiissssss a real bathroom. I went through the handbook the PCMOs gave us and started treating myself with the rehydration salts, and no food for a few days. This just added to the fun of sitting around and waiting for things to be done, as well as not getting out into the village to chat with people, as I wanted to be no more than a short walk to my latrine.

Friday after my doorway was finally done being framed with cement, I went over and borrowed a mop from my neighbor to clean up the mess. Several people asked me if I needed help cleaning during the week, because apparently it looked like I wasn't able to clean floors, when in reality I just hadn't made an effort to do so since the work hadn't been finished yet. The brooms here look like those cinnamon brooms one can buy during the Christmas holidays, except a little more full. Driving up from Kampala last week, I saw a woman, in the pouring rain, sweeping a gutter along a busy road with one of those brooms and a dust pan. She had on a vest that said something to the effect of "I work for the Ugandan National Roads such and such." It's amazing to me the effort people in this country put into cleaning things that will so easily get dirty so quickly again... especially since two minutes down the road there was flooding up to people's roofs. Anyway, back to my floor. Knowing that I'd just have to do it all over again, I put off mopping till the job was finished. I also moved my kitchen things into the second room because I've been finding way too many bugs in and among my things to make me happy. And plus there won't be a door between the sitting room and kitchen for a while (if ever) and I'd rather just have it all together.

Saturday I went into Lira and meandered through the market, bought mangoes at a discount because I talked to the woman for a while in Lango and made friends with her, I spent 50,000/= at the Indian Supermarket, and I purchased ingredients for fun foods such as tortillas, spaghetti sauce, and risotto. I can't wait till the package from my mom arrives with all my spices :D I scrubbed the latrine when I got home and half-ass built a cover for it to cut down on the number of flies, I washed some laundry, ate four tiny bananas (BRAT diet), and generally meandered around. I made rice for dinner last night but prepared it like risotto, so it was extra creamy and delicious. Today I'm off to buy some paint to finally paint my walls... I have no idea what colors but hopefully something will tickle my fancy. I feel like painting will make it seem more "mine" because then I can put up my pictures and maps and stuff that I've been avoiding doing since the construction was going on and I knew in the back of my mind that I was going to paint anyway.

I know all this is normal, the getting sick, feeling like things are taking forever, feeling like "why am I even doing this?"... It just sucks to actually be in the middle of it. This week will be better.

i have a door!

I spent Easter with a few other volunteers about 45 minutes from my house. We got a little sunburned, as happens here on the equator, ate delicious food cooked by Heather, drank room temperature tequila and krest (a sprite-ish wannabe), watched Anastasia, and passed out by 10 pm. When it gets dark at 7:30, and as a girl you have to lock yourself in pretty much by that point, staying up late loses some of its appeal. (I went to bed at NINE last night and it felt amazing.) Anyway, as I was laying in a bed that was not my own, I thought about how I, in no way, have that "ugh, I just wish I was HOME" feeling. Mostly, I think, because I don't have a home right now. It's way less sad that it sounds, so don't feel too badly for me just yet. A lot of times when I'm away for long periods of time, all I want is my own bed, in my own room, but I haven't had that for a long time, so I'm kind of content bouncing from place to place, packing an overnight bag to hang out with some cool people I know, crossing my fingers that my belongings, which have been strewn all over this country in the middle of Africa in various storage rooms, hotels, home stays, etc., are safe and sound. Maybe this is part of what Peace Corps instills in a person. I know for damn sure I can pack lighter that I have been able to in the past.

 Day 1, less of a home than a room with my things in it. 

I think the saddest part about all of that was that, technically, I have a home now. I have fourish rooms all to myself for the next two years, but they don't feel like "me" yet. When I got back to Lira on Monday morning, I went shopping for a few more things I needed (rope for laundry, clothespins, plates, silverware, bleach, hand soap, and a gas tank for my stove). The gas tank was way to heavy to even consider carrying the 6k back to Boroboro (not that I'd wanted to walk it anyway) so I called my principal/next door neighbor who said he could pick me up on the way back. The afternoon was spent watching two carpenters make a mess of my room as they knocked a hole in the wall between my sitting room and bedroom. I wish they had let me know it was going to be a messy affair, because I totally would have, oh, I don't know, zipped up my luggage. Closed my cabinet doors. Put away my iPod. Any number of things that would have avoided the clusterfuck of DUST that I had to deal with when the ordeal was through. My Ugandan broom is a joke when trying to deal with this, I'm going to have to buy a giant squeegee (yes, we have those here) and just dump water on my floor and squeegee it out... but not till they cut the second door into the kitchen.

Denis the Carpenter, with his chisel and block of wood. 

Hoooooly mess

My doorway!!!! (standing in the bedroom, looking into the sitting room)

I spent last night kind of rearranging my things after trying my best to clean it all up (some things might never be the same). It felt a lot more like home after I had access to more than one room at a time, and with a mirror up over my dresser. This morning I walked around the village with the principal and was introduced to the Bishop and the LC1 (the Local Council Chairperson, highest office on the most local level). I then returned home and washed my mosquito net and sheets, since they were embedded with concrete dust still. Apparently my water doesn't work until the afternoon, so I had to wait until then to rinse everything (I'd collected enough rainwater the night before to wash, but not rinse. Yes, I collect rain water. I actually just put my buckets out, hope they don't get stolen!) I also did dishes, ate some ramen noodles, and finished another book. (13!) The carpenter came back to frame the doorway (they cut the hole with only a hammer and chisel, it took like five hours) with wood and cement, and again they made somewhat of a mess. The art of throwing cement into a gap between a chiseled out doorway and a wooden frame must be a tough one to master. There was cement everywhere (this was after I was like.. hey, should I move my things today, is it going to be messy? and was answered, no you leave them, it's ok.) Oh, Uganda.

There is a gnarly looking storm a-brewin', and I wish I wasn't such a scaredy cat that I don't want to hang out in my yard and watch it. Speaking of cats, three stories. One, there was an intense cat-fight outside last night, I really wanted to go check it out, but my mosquito net proves to be enough of a barrier to keep me in bed unless it's something like I've had to pee for 4 hours and my bladder is screaming in pain. Two, today I heard another mad cat fight while I was sitting outside reading, except it was followed by peels of children's laughter. The angry cat noises/laughter alternated back and forth enough times to make me think a cat was being tortured by children somewhere around me. I wanted to go investigate, but I don't think I have a place in the community enough yet to go up to someones house and demand they treat animals with kindness. Three, a cat sat by the edge of my yard this evening and yowled so so sadly. It was a pretty tuxedo cat, and when I went to check it out, I was told that the cat is stubborn and steals things. I think I will put out some dried fish for it and see if I can't get myself a pet. Or better yet, see if it has kittens somewhere for me to steal. This will surely end well, there are no downsides.

Also, my internet is suuuuper slow out here in the village, and I'm really lucky that I have it at all... that being said, pictures are not going to be uploaded or emailed for a while, until I can get into town and be closer to civilization. Sorry :(

Love and miss you all!

Liz

I woke up about an hour ago, after my first night in my new home. It wasn't as traumatic as it had the potential to be, my first night in the middle of Uganda, pretty much all alone. At training Rachelle told us that it might be a night to lock ourselves and just cry, something it seemed like she did two years ago when she first got to site. I locked myself in when it got dark, but no crying, amazingly (I'm a crier).

I went to Lira yesterday afternoon, after what felt like one of the 4 longest days of my life, and bought two basins, a jerrycan, two cooking pots, toilet paper, peanut butter, rolls, two bowls, ramen noodles, a big ladle, a mattress, a bigger mosquito net (double bed, what what), and four screw hooks to set up said mosquito net. I did not manage to buy a gas can for my stove, but will try again today. I made it home about 3 minutes before a huge storm and really had to pee. I tried to brave my latrine for the first time but there were spiders and a gecko and a moth that kept ambushing me, so I called uncle and went inside and peed in a basin (not the weirdest thing I've peed in while in Uganda).

I rearranged my room, set up my bed, and hung a map of Uganda on the wall. It's probably right where the new door between the bedroom and the sitting room will go, so it's definitely not permanent, I just wanted something up. As I was moving things around, I discovered a leak in my ceiling, great. My principal came over and invited me for dinner and I let him know about it. I declined the dinner offer because I'd bought a couple things to eat in town, and was so tired that all I wanted to do was finish up and lay down. I didn't feel like being "on" and social again. I had to explain that I'm not going to church tomorrow, or ever really, and I hope I did it tactfully. Sometimes (read: a lot of the times) Ugandans can be very persistent when you give an answer they don't want to hear. I haven't gone to church regularly since I was in high school, and don't really plan on it while I'm here. It's such a religious culture though that the concept of not being religious, or even not having a religion doesn't make sense to them sometimes. I would probably be more relaxed about it and willing to go once in a while if I knew that it would be understood when I didn't want to go. Maybe I'm just being way too stubborn.

I'm super pumped that I have power at my site, however, I have this nifty little gadget called a powermatic that monitors the current coming through and shuts it off if there is a surge or fluctuation that would damage my electronics. When the power is unstable, the light is red, when it calms down, the light changes to yellow while it monitors it for a bit, and then if the power is stable it changes to green to let it through. In the 15 hours that I have been here, the light has only changed to green three times, for a total of about five minutes. Fuck. I can totally plug things in, but I'm knowingly taking a risk of blowing everything up and rendering them useless. Gotta solve this, because what's the use in having electricity if I can't use it?

It's going to take a while to arrange my house, there are so many things that I'm going to have to improvise and make up as I go along. For instance, I don't have a kitchen sink, but I do know that somehow I can put a tap in the bottom of a jerrycan and put it over a basin. But I have no idea how to do that and my limited Lango mixed with Lira residents' limited English = we have no idea what we're talking about. There should be a door soonish between my bedroom and sitting room that will let me move about my house at night, but it's not there yet, so ALL of my things are in my bedroom for now. Water pools on the floor of my latrine and soaked a roll of toilet paper last night. My walls are cement and the pushpins I brought are useless. This is going to be a fun few months. I'll post pictures today or tomorrow hopefully.

Love & miss you!

PCV!!!

Today I totally took an oath to defend the constitution against all enemies foreign and domestic, and some other stuff that I forget. But I'm legit now and it feels so much better than I could have imagined. I'm so proud of myself for doing this... I was sitting there the whole time listening to the ambassador and our country director and a couple of my fellow volunteers speak about what Peace Corps means, its history, and the impact it will have on our lives. I was trying to think back through my application process and remember what it felt like when I first filled out the application, when it was kind of just a castle in the sky, and the fact that I did it. I put aside my life, said goodbye, got on a plane and moved across the world. Damn. I have a million things to pack up and forty three other people to celebrate with tonight before we say our goodbyes and move off on our own tomorrow. As much as a pain in the ass as it was today, I'm glad that I mapped out my first five weeks at site and made a quasi-calendar of things to accomplish, and that we get assignments to complete such as "greet five people and let them know what you'll be doing in their community for two years."

I ate so many canapes at the swearing in. I'm stuffed, but the chicken nuggets and garlic mayo were to *die* for.